somewhere over the rainbow;

Monday, May 08, 2006

over the moon; under the sea

i am here to blog again! hahas! today is a nice day i supposed except my head is so pain after chem lecture x( hais, pain until i feel like dying! hahas!
went to school with ahS early today because she left her notes in school and she got a test! hahas, BLUR ahS! hahas, chatted alot on the way to school! just love going school with ahS cos i will be telling all my things! greeted my SHIFU*YY early in the morning! hahas, YY*SHIFU rocks cos he will be passing all the slacking skills to me! hahas! since yesterday nite he become my shifu liao! YAY! got shifu is good xD did my NAFA 2.4km today! hahas, the worst of what i feel! feel like slapping myself! i let my mind run wild and i just cant let myself run! i saw someone and i dont know what to do! he is the one making me to run faster or slower? argh, i am like crazy! going crazy going crazy again! argh, feel like screaming his name, cheering for him too! but fail to do it! CHEER for that mingshen larh! that crazy MONKEY! hahas, he did something very touching to me yesterday! i cried after seeing what he wanted to show me! YOU ARE MY FRIEND! hahas, remember what you told me! thanks okie! hahas! that dawei run so fast! feel that he is like the one who is chiong-ing all the way! GO DAWEI GO! hahas! ahS was so funny cos she say something so funny today! hahas, thanks huh ahS alot alot! going to treat her lots of things x) hahas.
GP make everyone of us laugh so much, hahas, even ROFL too! thats so funny! my chinese test is gone liao! OMG, i was like dont know how to answer! argh, somemore i feel that i didnt complete the paper! hais, die for my chinese liao! sadsad! more sad! argh, sad lyfe! econs extra lesson after school! omg, one hour! hahas, today i walked home again! always walk home when i am not in good mood or sad mood? walking home make me think alot! my mind just cant stop thinking so many things! i love the route to my house now x)
chatted with boon*erzi, heye*kor, marvin*laopa, zh*tangge! hahas, at first is chatting with my tang ge only but he ask me add so many people huh! so like wadd onli! have a NICE NICE chat anyway! hahas, talk about the stuff we used to talk! hahas, they are still the same and i am too! hahas, feel like we are still in sec5 having our O levels! hahas, boon*erzi actually miss secondary lyfe! the way he talk make me feel missing so much too! i miss too! YES, I DO! i miss! ahahs, tangge! can u dont be so gan chiong! dont need keep repeating urself de hor! ahahs, so like wadd onli! i know is thurs xD wont forget, dont worry! i am not that BLUR! hahas! u are the one who is blur i think!
chatted with someone who is so legend to me! he finally talked something! hahas, feeling so OVER the moon now! means he is okie liao! so i dont have to worry so much! haha! is nice seeing ur frend okie again! the feeling is the nicest ever! hahas, SHIGEHISA! he is the one who talk nonsense to me always! hahas, entertain my jokes, my craps and alot more! i did entertain him by allowing him to hao lian his good phy results to me because i am always lousy-er than him! hahas! the nicest feeling is u being OKIE huh! dont be liddat anymore okie! i very scare one lei xDD try to be chatty like me! hahas! you run fast today! hahas! congrats okie! ahahs! x) take care and hope to see ya smile on ya face always! remember ur smile looks nice x)
teddybear is wasting her talents if she dont want to be a song writer! hahas, i really miss my teddy bear! i miss my clown too! i miss my qing ai de too! they are the one who i am really alive when i am with them! hahas, i really love the 3 of them! not forgetting #23 who is anzel! ahhas! i love the 4 of them alot alot alot! my lyfe wont be nice without them by my side! I LOVE U GUYS; when the next time we will meet xD i cant wait to have fun with you all! ahhas!
sometimes i wonder when can i stop all the things which i dont like! i dont feel nice or smae with the same people now, because i am the one changing or wadd? am i still the old lihui the people ever know? i feel like i am the one who is running away from reality! i am the one who make myself not to speak so much anymore! i am the one who try to bring a fake smile on the face! i am no longer the kaixinguo lihui that i used to be! dont feel what am i doing is the same as before! argh, whats has happen to me! what am i supposed to do! the more i wanted to change; the more i will failed! i tend to be myself only with the people who i understand and they understand me! i am myself in front of all my 5/1-ers, pri sch mates, riversidians, i can be myself in front of shigehisa, vincente, mingshen, myra, char, purple, ahS and some only. some people make me feel like being myself will be bringing trouble only! hais, what am i supposed to do? i really care about what others thinking of me although my xiaodi ask me dont do so. i tried, but failed! xiaodi, i am lost again and again! dont you feel that i am always the one who is asking for help? argh, why am i so bothered abt myself now! where is the one who used to laugh so much! where is the one who used to crap so much! where is the one who used to scream like mad woman! where is the lihui that always cheer people up and dont feel so lost ever!
sometimes, i feel like being alone crying in my room, letting whatever is inside me to be out. just feel like crying and crying for my lyfe! i cannot take it and the only way out is to cry! hais, whats going on? i wonder and wonder but no answer! how can i be stronger in order not to let my tears roll? what can i do to make myself better? maybe nothing can ever save me again. maybe i fall too many times and this is what i get! i am always the one who is so stupid! this is the new lihui i supposed! so i must get used to the new me too! argh, cant do it i think!
someone aroound me is suffering i think, she seem sad with me i think. sorry if i make u suffer or wadd, i dont wish too! sorry. maybe i think too much or wadd but if it really hard for you, den i back off x) not that i am heartless or wadd! everyone should be happy in their lyfe. i am making my choice too! i am thinking real hard this time round.
tml having phy SPA! omg, going to be dead again! always cant do my SPA well! i am like experiment idiot! totally an idiot! i dont know why also! hope tml the SPA will be fine! argh, praying hard!* hahas, tml going to be a short nice day x) hope everything nice and sweet! going to study for SPA, take care people! hahas, cheerup and smile x)
i am just locking everything up, with the keys thrown away.

when i say i love you ; i really do (:
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only illusions;

10:12 PM